If you have Monday off for Memorial Day and your company is still paying you, consider yourself lucky. According to USA Today, only one in four Americans has paid vacation time. Unlike the European Union, which requires employers to grant their staff 20 days of paid vacation, and Japan and Canada, which require 10 days, the US sets no minimum.

Is running the exercise equivalent to a cheeseburger? The Wall Street Journal says there’s new evidence that a lot of running does more harm than good to your health. It was once commonly thought that running regularly could add 6 years to your life, but recent research says for those who run more than 30 miles a week the benefits disappear. The Journal says sports medicine experts are reluctant to go on the record about the dangers of too much exercise, for fear that some people will take it as encouragement to stay sedentary.

Mirror, mirror on the wall, in the last decade who has sold the most concert tickets of them all? The answer is country singer Kenny Chesney, who, since 2003 has sold about 9.8 million tickets. Dave Matthews is number two on the list, though he rarely plays at the big arenas that Chesney favors. The Boss comes in at number three. The Wall Street Journal atributes Chesney’s success in big venues to his “savvy communion with local fans and dogged attention to detail.”

The Miami Heat has plenty of bold-name cache, but it’s the team’s dance troupe that really brings out the fans, says the Sun Sentinel. The NBA’s first “troupe of dancing senior citizens,” the Heat’s Golden Oldies range in age from 60 to 80. Despite their age, being a member is no cake walk. They must audition every year and attend weekly rehearsals. Most, however, swear the exercise regimen and the adoring fans keep them feeling young. SEE VIDEO

Yesterday was an historic day for the Boy Scouts of America, reports the Dallas Morning News. Gathered at the Gaylord Texan hotel, 61 percent of the 1,400 council members voted to lift the ban on openly gay members, enough to pass a resolution. The members kept a ban on openly gay adults serving as leaders or volunteers and said that any sexual conduct, heterosexual or homosexual, would not be tolerated. They also upheld their ban on avowed atheists, stating that Scouts must “maintain their belief and duty to God.”

Who knew the Mister Softee song had lyrics? I always thought the jingle was part of a conspiracy to make sane people slowly go mad. But not so. The New York Daily News says it has unearthed the original lyrics to the jingle, written by the company’s advertising firm back in the 1960s. The first line: The creamiest dreamiest soft ice cream you get from Mister Softee.

There’s a funny anecdote in USA Today’s profile of “Mr Chow” actor Ken Jeong, who’s now a Hollywood fixture thanks to his roles in the “Hangover” movies and on NBC’s “Community.” Jeong is actually trained and licensed as a medical doctor but when he answered a “doctor in the house?” call recently on a flight he was turned away by his would-be patient who said, “You’re no doctor, get outta here. You’re Mr. Chow!”

The Washington Post calls President Obama our “Consoler-in-Chief” in this morning’s paper. The president is heading to Oklahoma this Sunday to be with the victims of the devastating tornado that wreaked havoc on the state. The Post says his “national itinerary of woe” is a relatively new role for the president, “one that reflects not just the emphasis on an ability to communicate and express empathy, but also an increase in power to direct the federal government to assist in recovery.”

The New York Times makes a big deal of Tesla’s decision to repay its federal loan. The paper says it’s a sign that the electric car business is getting on its feet. Tesla was able to repay its loan nine years before it was due, a boon to the Obama administration, whose clean-energy initiatives took a hit when solar-panel maker Solyndra bit the dust. Note: Tesla customers will still receive a $7,500 tax credit, which drops the purchase price for a Model S to $62,400.

London is in shock after a brutal killing left a solider butchered on its streets. Two men wielding cleavers and knives were seen by scores of eyewitnesses “chopping” a man to death after running him down in a car. They were screaming ‘Allah Akbar’ and shouting at passersby to film them. After the attack, the killer ranted into a camera while covered in blood. The men were subsequently shot down by police, says the Daily Mail. VIDEO

We’ve been collecting Starbucks Alter Egos here at Pat’s Papers for well over a year. And we’ve accumulated quite a list. But this morning the New York Post blows us out of the water with this alter ego gold. That’s Mr. Derek Jeter, or ‘Philip’ as his cup reads, picking up his morning coffee from a Starbucks in Greenwich Village. The Yankee captain is apparently fond on nicknames, says the Post previously checking into a hotel under the name “Johnny Drama.” SEE OUR FULL ROSTER

Houston we have a problem. An Astros vendor was fired yesterday after he was caught on tape bringing the tray of snow cones he was selling into the bathroom with him…while sitting down to relieve himself. The Chronicle says the man didn’t just put them next to the sink, but brought them into the stall and set them on the floor.

Note to would-be killers: when planning a murder, be sure your phone is off. The Sun Sentinel says a Florida man was arrested after he accidentally butt-dialed 911 and then proceeded to detail his plans for killing a man. When he actually went through with the murder a month later, police were able to use his recorded conversation as evidence.

The inventor of the GIF received a lifetime achievement award at last night’s Webby Awards to celebrate his popular file format. But the New York Times says instead of the usual thank you speech bromides, Steve Wilhite took the opportunity to clear up something that’s been bothering him—how people have been mispronouncing his invention. Wilhite insists that GIF should be said with a soft g, like ‘jif.’

Could future missions to Mars use 3-D printers to “print” food? The Washington Post says NASA has given a Texas company a $125,000 grant to explore the possibility of making “nutritious and flavorful food suitable for astronauts using a digital recipe.” The idea is that printers would combine various powders and spit out something resembling an entree, smell included. The first test? Pizza, which contains layers “a key principle used in 3-D printing technology.”

A Silicon Valley startup has brought an interesting new dimension to the gun control debate, unveiling technology yesterday that will allow gun owners to know when their weapons have been moved and disable them remotely. The San Jose Mercury News says an alarm would trigger on the owner’s cell phone when their firearm changes location, prompting them to take action. The NRA is, obviously, not a fan of the “smart gun” technology, saying that “a firearm that does not function when it is required to is not a smart gun.”

There’s a really disturbing privacy story in the Wall Street Journal this morning about Verizon and other cell phone companies tracking your movements and then selling the data to marketers. The new direction takes the data trawling we’ve all become somewhat accustomed to as Internet users and combines it with information about your exact location. Retailers worried about “show-rooming” are one group that is very interested in this data, as it would allow them to see what websites customers are visiting while in their store.

Indonesian legislators are considering making “sex among singles” a five-year jail sentence, reports the Wall Street Journal this morning. Making co-habitation and black magic illegal are also under consideration. Experts say if it happens, it would “mark a significant shift” away from the moderate policies the young Islamic democracy has adopted thus far.

The New York Times focuses on the classic Gin and Tonic today, wondering if can be made a little more interesting while still maintaining “restraint.”  Many bartenders have managed subtle upgrades to the classic cocktail, thanks to a slew of new gins and tonics on the markets. Speaking of, the Times a “showdown” sidebar that names Schweppes as the best tonic water.

Have $190 million to spare? Then you might be interested in Copper Beech Farm, an estate in Connecticut that currently is asking the country’s biggest listing price. The Hartford Courant says the $190 million price tag will buy you a 13,500-square-foot house with 12 bedrooms and 9 bathrooms, 4,000 feet of beach front and access to two private islands.